Marriage Advice From the Bachelor - Pt 2

1 Cor 7:10-16, 39

Marriage divorce and remarriage has been one of the most hotly debated biblical teaching of all times. There is so much involved that we could spend a month studying it and not address all that is involved in this discussion.

One of the elders commended me on how I handled the topic last week and said, just simply teach what the Bible has to say on this topic. I almost laughed because that is exactly what everyone who argues their point of view claims!

We probably wont come to “the answer” in today’s lesson, but maybe you will gain a little more understanding of the complexities of the issue and also realize beyond a doubt that God hates divorce. Everyone who respects the Bible agrees on that. Where the breakdown comes in is what are the consequences of divorce and who accountable and to what degree.

Paul focuses on a very narrow aspect of divorce and remarriage and so we’ll look at what he has to say in greater detail than the issue in whole.

PRAYER

I. The Two Main Points of View

A. There are several points of view about this topic

1. No one can ever divorce no matter what.

2. No one can be remarried no matter what.

3. Only the innocent party can remarry.

4. Only Christians are under this marriage law.

5. Anyone can remarry if he asks for forgiveness of his sins.

B. View One

1. There are 3 texts that we can look at in the New testament to deal with divorce and remarriage

a) Matt 5:31-33

b) Matt 19:1-12

c) 1 Cor 7:10-16

2. One view is that looking at the Matthew passages and some Old Testament passages, is that all men are under the marriage law and only adultery can dissolve a marriage in God’s eyes.

3. This is what we call the traditional view because churches have traditionally held this view of divorce and remarriage.

C. View Two

1. Another point of view is that the sin is divorce and adultery is the first time they come together sexually, but it is not an ongoing sin as the first view would claim.

2. Thus, they can be forgiven of the sin of divorce and remarriage.

3. As you dig deeper into the Greek of Matthew and as understanding of Jewish law continues to progress, there is a lot of merit to this view.

4. Another argument used in this view is the woman at the well. Jesus recognized she had been married 5 times.

a) He didn’t say you were married once and lived with 4 other men.

b) He said in Jn 4:17 - you have had 5 husbands and the man you are now with is not your husband.

D. Deep and diverse

1. This subject is deep and opinions are diverse as I have mentioned.

2. Maybe at some point in time we will do a series on this topic on Sunday nights.

II. Paul’s Words to the Corinthians

A. To Christian Marriage

1. Paul continues to address a marriage of two Christians in vs. 10, 11.

2. The question must have been asked if they could divorce like most every one around them was doing.

3. That is the same question that has begun to arise in the church today as our culture continues to impact on the church.

4. Paul is pretty clear on this point in vs. 10

a) No I, but the Lord

b) Now he isn’t giving his opinion, he is saying what God says.

c) God doesn’t want divorce to happen.

d) We always argue the rights of the innocent party, but what about the rights of the children to be raised in a normal God fearing home?

e) If you can save your marriage, isn’t that so much better for all involved to see God’s love reflected in our love?

f) God wants reconciliation if at all possible.

5. But there are times when reconciliation just cannot happen. What do we do then?

a) Here Paul says they are to remain unmarried.

b) If you refer back to Matt. Jesus gives one exception. Adultery.

c) When the marriage trust is so shattered by the act of Adultery, God understand that some cannot ever get past that.

d) But, in both cases, divorce is the absolute last resort, not the first!

B. Believer and Nonbeliever

1. Vs 12-16 deals with the more immediate issue of believers married to non-believers.

2. To begin this thought, I feel vs 39 and 2 Cor 6:ff strongly discourage Christians from marrying non-Christians.

a) There are too many spiritual obstacles that could cause the Christian to lose their faith.

b) Christians from a failed marriage with an unbeliever should know better.

c) They have seen first hand the pain and difficulty it takes to be a faithful Christian when they don’t have a spouse that supports them.

d) Why in the world would they enter back into a relationship like the one they left.

e) If the new man or woman is a truly good person, then they would be willing to become a Christian before the marriage.

f) I don’t know that I could say it is a God demanded concept, but is one a Christian needs to very carefully consider before marriage.

C. The marriage of believer and non-believer

1. Paul is probably dealing here with a couple who neither one were Christians when they married.

2. At some point in time one of them becomes a Christian and the spouse resents that. What should they do?

a) First, be the best spouse you can be and hopefully your example will win over your spouse.

b) But if that fails, and your spouse still chooses to leave you, you are not under the marriage obligation to that spouse any longer.

III. Concl.

A. As you read this chapter, one question arises that has to be answered.

1. Why stick it out?

2. Marriage is often referred to as the same relationship God has for man.

a) If we lightly throw away that life long covenant to our spouse, how can we respect the life long covenant we made to Christ?

b) Marriage is a symbol of God’s relationship to man.

c) The deep commitment to love each other reflects the love commitment we made to God and he made to us.